So Fathers' day was Sunday. A day we set aside to pay a little extra attention to our fathers and remind them why they matter. But why do fathers deserve a day like that? Some don't. My understanding is that Tom's father was only one in a biological sense. But my father does deserve the attention. And then some.
He has put up with some serious shit to earn his title as Dad. The world is a messy place and he's been part of the mess. His kids have been part of the mess. His wife has been part of the mess. And through all of it, he is loving, caring, and perceptive. Our lives were never perfect but he always put in some effort to improve it. There were times when it backfired- remember the "tail" incident in Jr High? And there were many more when it worked flawlessly. When Sean and I were little, money was tight. We had everything we needed but the "wants" category was often untouched. But if we wanted a book, he found a way to make it happen. It's the little things that make a father into a Dad. My father had those things.
He set a good example. Nobody is perfect. My dad has never been a flawless exemplar of what it is to be the ideal father. He has been a shining example of what it is to be human- warts and all. He set an example for my brother and I as to discipline, hard work, and love. Not only did he set this example, he then scooted us into the real world saying, "I expect you two to do better at this than I did." That's not to say he wasn't good enough. It's to say that he is (and now we are) aware that there is always room for improvement. Good enough is neither. Not good- not enough. If you can make it better, you should. This is how I was raised and this is why Fathers' day matters to me.
I love you, Dad.
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